Getting ready to speak to Technology professionals

My Confession

I must confess that, in the past, I used to view some audiences as collective groups. For example, I’d think, “Okay, this is a group of engineers so I can’t bring my normal speaking style to this event.” And I’d change my style and almost always fail. Fortunately for me, another speaker pulled me aside one day and said, “Craig, they hired you for a reason. They want YOU!”

Realization

With that realization I came to see that all of our audiences are made up of individual human beings that have feelings, emotions, and ways of thinking and that you can’t just look at them as one static group. They are whole people. I say this because some speakers think they need to change their entire style to speak to certain groups. This is untrue. You need to still be you. However, you can make subtle adjustments to fit the culture of each event.

Even Thoracic Surgeons?

The first time I spoke to a group of thoracic surgeons I had doubts about bringing my energetic style to the table. I thought since they were surgeons that maybe I should leave my humor and emotions out and simply give them the logic. After all, heart surgery is serious is it not?

However, soon after I began, it hit me that they were individual human beings long before becoming surgeons. In other words, they’d like me to make them TALL (Think, Act, Laugh, and Learn) just as other audieneces would. So I gave them me. Following the presentation many of the surgeons (and some scientists) approached me and said things like:

 “Thank you for bringing this conference to life. These conferences are usually so boring.”

 “You gave me a new sense of why I do what I do. Thank you!”

 “I am so motivated to get back to my research. Do you have any tapes (that’s what we used to call them)?”

Realize that none of these comments was about the logic, but about change. Change is sparked by emotions backed up by logic. It’s very difficult to connect with peoples’ emotions when you’re not being your true self. No matter whom you address, make sure YOU are the one addressing them.

Should I ever change based on the audience?

 You don’t need to change who you are but you can certainly make adjustments to your content and your delivery. Adjust for your audience. Even though you have individuals in your audience, you can still customize your speech in ways that will help them connect with you the best. Just make sure, like everything else in speaking, the adjustments are subtle. Look at the ways many speakers adjust to certain types of audiences while retaining their own style:

The Key to Your Connection?                                     

All in all, the key to making a connection is you. No matter what small adjustments you make please keep in mind that the audience still wants to experience the real you. Tell your stories and make your points. They hired you for a reason. They want you just the way you are.

Audience in Bankstown, Australia

When you build yourself up, you let your audience down. Let’s face it; there are some speakers who use the platform to stroke their ego. I may have been one of them in the past. However, when we talk about how great we are and speak only of our successes, our audience members think of us in 1 of 2 ways:

1. “Wow, he sure is full of himself.”

or

2. “Well, I guess he’s just special.”

As a speaker, being considered special is just as bad as being considered “full of yourself.” When your audience sees you as special, what do you think they begin to think?

They probably think, “Of course those strategies work for him because he’s special. They won’t work for me.”

They have a built-in excuse not to use your advice and, consequently, you become worthless to that audience. You can avoid this by using the following 3 Audience Impact Tools that will not only get you connected with your audience but will also spark them to act on your message. In other words, you will be valuable to your audience.

Audience Impact Tool Number 1: Put the Process, not the Person, on a Pedestal

In other words, don’t brag about yourself; brag about the process (or formula, recipe, toolkit, etc.) you have uncovered in your life’s journey. When you do this, the audience members think, “I am interested in learning more about this process. I don’t know if it really works, but I’m at least interested in learning more about it.”

This gets your audience a little closer to taking action on your message, because you’ve succeeded in building interest in your process rather than in you. However, there are still two major obstacles. Although they are interested in your process, they still aren’t sure if it really works. Your story should begin to prove to them that the process works, but Audience Impact Tool number 2 will take your audience’s confidence in your process to another level.

Audience Impact Tool Number 2 – Quantify Your Process

For example, in the midst of your story or activity, you might say, “I came across these tools that I now refer to as the 4 Rs to Remarkable Results that you can use to make change work for you instead of against you.” Or you might say, “This 3-step formula was used by the great orators of the past and the present. Everyone from Aristotle to Anthony Robbins has used these 3 steps.”

Why Quantify the Process?

The reason you should quantify your process is because specifics build credibility. Your process goes from being a loose intangible mess to a tight proven step by step system. It also naturally builds the curiosity for your audience members to think, “I want to hear all 4 steps. Come on, what’s step 1?” In this way, quantifying your process not only builds credibility for that process, but it also teases your audience to want to know more. As a result, they will buy-into the fact that the process worked for you. However, they still might not think it will work for them. That’s where Audience Impact Tool Number 3 comes in handy.

Audience Impact Tool Number 3 – Share Your Four Fs 

If you want your audience members to act on your message, you must help them feel like you (or the main characters in your story) are similar to them. Think similar, not special. One step you can easily take is to break yourself down so your audience members know you are closer to them than you are to, say, Zeus.

For example, I regularly tell people the low score I received the first time I took the SATs (Standardized Achievement Tests we use in many States in the US). What do you think happens inside of the minds of my audience members? Chances are they think, “Well, if he can be successful with his background, I can definitely be successful at this too. Give me that process.”

Neither Les Brown nor Anthony Robbins has a college degree and they play that up for all it’s worth. It helps their audience members know that it’s their processes, formulas, and mindsets, not their special unmatched innate abilities, that have made the difference. This helps audience members feel hopeful.

But I Haven’t Climbed Mount Everest!

So often speakers complain to me, “Craig, I haven’t climbed Mount Everest or done anything like that so why would people want to hear from me?”

So what? So you haven’t climbed Mt. Everest. Has your audience? Chances are nobody in your audience has climbed Mt. Everest so how would they relate to that? Here’s my question. Have you ever been fired? Have you ever had a really bad day? Have you ever been embarrased? Your audience will relate to these situations much more than they will to Mt. Everest. And if you offer a road from where you were then to where you are today, they’ll likely take it. Why? Because they feel similar.

Many average speakers won’t allow themselves to share their failures or open up to an audience in this way. However, the quickest way to build a connection with your audience is to share your…

1. Failures
2. Flaws
3. Frustrations
4. Firsts

If you do this, you will connect fast and deep. Let’s take sharing your firsts as an example. Many times your audience members tend to see you where you currently are and think, “I’ll never get there.” However, if you share where you were at first (i.e. failing in speeches, etc.), they will realize that if they take hold of your processes, they can have the same (or even greater) success than you.

As I always say…

Let your long road lead to their shortcut

Final thoughts

Remember, your job as a speaker is usually to sell people on the results they will get when they utilize a certain formula, process, tool, or recipe. It has nothing to do with you being a genius, it has everything to do with you uncovering the process that worked for you (or for your customers) and will work for others. Your story becomes the proof that they can use the process too.

People want the truth wrapped up in proof

The 3 Audience Impact Tools

1. Put the process, not the person, on a pedestal
2. Quantify your process
3. Share your failures, flaws, frustrations, and firsts

Your Turn 

What do you do to put the process, not the person, on a pedestal?

Next step?

There is a definite process for telling stories that put the process, not the person, on a pedestal. If you tell stories in the most effective way, you will automatically become valuable to your audience and connect with them deeply. Learn the 9 Cs in my Storytelling Home-Study Course for Speakers at http://www.edgeoftheirseats.com

24 Responses to “Avoid Being Worthless to Your Audience (3 Tools)”

With Dr. Tony Alessandra - a man who knows how to reach people where THEY live

After studying influence and implementing ideas successfully for more than a decade and a half, I thought I knew a lot of what there was to know about getting people to take action. However, one of the most important ideas I ever learned I picked up only a couple of years ago. It’s a tool that will excite your audience to act on your message. It’s what I call the Relative Result.

Why will the Relative Result work for You?

Click the audio below and listen to this very quick audio of me getting my audience to take the next step.

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Quiz:

How many times better can you be one year from now?

Three times, right?

Did I just say you’ll be a better speaker? No.

Did I just say you will improve? No.

I said you’ll be three times better than the speaker you are today. In other words, I gave what I’ve come to call a “Relative Result.” This is a result that’s based on where you currently are today and how much better you can be tomorrow. The Relative Result I used for 52 Speaking Tips has brought me more prospects and customers than even I imagined. Why? Because I’m not offering tips or an arbitrary number. I’m offering a way for you to be 3 times better than you are today. That’s why so many people took action on it.

The Mistake Most Speakers Make

What most speakers do is they pick an arbitrary number for their results such as “You’ll be able to close 40% of your audience on making an appointment with you.” So what happens to the person in the audience who is already closing 45%? How will your result benefit him or her?

The “close 40%” result is a number that’s not related to where your audience member currently is. What would be better is if you said, “You’ll be able to close twice as many people than you’re currently closing.” That’s a relative result, and it becomes more real to your audience member. Why? They can feel what doubling their closing ratio will do for them because they know it will bring twice as much of everything they currently have.

Relative Results Feel Real

Staying with this closing ratio example, the audience members can feel what it would be like to double their closing ratio by thinking of…

• Doubling their number of customers
• Doubling their revenues
• Hopefully even doubling their profits

 They can feel it because it’s based on where they currently are.

The Most Important Reason to Use Relative Results

The most important reason to use a Relative Result is…

It automatically meets each audience member where he or she lives.

For example, what if someone making $200,000 per year is in the same audience as someone making $50,000 per year? What most speakers would do is say something like, “When you implement these strategies, you’ll be on your way to making at least 6 figures.” Well, how’s that going to motivate the guy who’s already making $200,000 per year? It’s probably not.

However, the speaker could say, “You’ll be well on your way to doubling your income within one year once you implement these tools.”

Will that motivate the guy making $200,000? Sure.

Will it motivate the guy making $50,000? Sure.

Why? Because relative results hit you where you live.  That’s the beauty of it.

One of my goals, which I borrowed from Alex Mandossian is, “To turn my annual income into my monthly income within 36 months.” Alex has suggested that goal for his Teleseminar Secrets clients and he has many clients. So you know what that means? We all have different numbers, but we still all have the same goal. That goal hits us where we live because we know our base of what we currently make.

Arbitrary = No Emotion and no Connection

Audience members can’t feel emotionally what an arbitrary number like “closing 40% of your audience” will do because it has no basis in their lives. It’s not (to use a textbook industry term) activating their prior knowledge. But doubling or tripling can be felt because there’s a base with which to start. What you heard me say in my audio is “you’ll become 3 times better than the speaker you are today.”

In my audience members’ minds, they’re probably thinking that means…

•  Three times the impact on their audience
• Three times the fee they get paid
• Three times as many testimonials
• Three times as many referrals
• Three times as many new customers
• Three times as many product sales

There are many ways they can feel what three times is because they base it on where they currently are and then simply multiply that by three of everything.

 Caveat: Make sure you are conservative in your results. I don’t say you will be “Twenty times better than the speaker you are today.” I say “Three times better” because I have witnessed people I coach become at least three times better and get way more than three times the engagements, testimonials, etc. In other words, make sure the tools you have can deliver on that result (if they actually implement the tools).

This is Great for Your Own Goal-Setting Too!

To dive slightly off topic for a moment, this idea of Relative Results is something I suggest integrating into your own goal-setting as well. Instead of picking arbitrary and baseless numbers such as “I’m going to make $100,000 this year in product sales,” pick a relative result such as, “This year I will triple my product sales income over last year’s.” Of course, when you write your goal, you can put the actual numbers in as well. So it might be, “This year I will triple my product sales from $50,000 to $150,000.”

One of the goals I set last year was, “I will double my number of leads (prospects) by March 31^st.” Of course I included the actual numbers in my goal as well. But check out what happens when I say “Double my number of leads.” I stay fired up from the goal because it lets me know that, every time I send out an offer to my leads, I will bring in twice as much income as I did the last time I sent out that offer.” See how that works? I just double everything in my mind and that’s what keeps me fired up! It’s beautiful.

How Can You Make Relative Results Work for You?

Once you learn to sell results and not the products, and you learn to translate your products into results, and you learn to sell the result before the resource (this is all covered in my Mastering Back of the Room Sales Home-Study Course for Speakers which is currently discounted until January 15th), you can then take advantage of using Relative Results by making promises such as:

It could double your income

It could get you there in half the time it currently takes you

It could triple your closing rate

Challenge?

For your very next speech, give your audience a Relative Result whether it’s doubling something, doing something in half the time, or whatever result you feel you can offer with integrity.

Your Turn?

I’m interested to know. Have you ever offered a Relative Result? If so, what was it?

13 Responses to “The Power of the Relative Result”

Reach don't preach

Most audiences do not want to be preached to outside of the church. However, it is sometimes easy to fall into preaching especially when you are very passionate about your message. Below are three guidelines you can follow to prevent destroying your speech due to preaching.

Guideline #1 – The soft “you”

The word “you” is the most important word in speaking and, frankly, speakers do not use it enough. However, some speakers do use it quite often but there’s one big problem. They use the hard “you” rather than the soft “you.” What’s the difference? Listen to the quick audio below to see the difference.

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Did you hear the difference? The hard “you” sounds like you’re commanding your audience and forcing them to listen to you. The soft “you” is much more inviting. In fact, you should listen to the very beginning of this story and count the number of “you/your” words that I use in only 57 seconds. You will need to pay close attention because some of these “you/your” words can pass by in a barely noticeable way.

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Welcome back. How many “you/your” words did you hear? I counted 15 in 57 seconds. With all those “you/your” statements, did it make my speech sound “preachy?” No. Why? Because each was a soft “you” rather than a hard one. But, rest assured, it’s very important to use many more “you/your” statements than “I” statements. In the audio you just heard, I used “you” or “your” once every 3.8 seconds. You don’t have to keep up that rate throughout the entire speech but I just wanted you to see that it’s possible (and effective) to use many “you/your” words without preaching. Use that soft “you.”

Guideline #2 – Let the story make the point

Too many speakers tell their story and then spend far too much time driving home their point. If you tell the story with the most effective structure, then your audience will be 80% across the bridge to understanding and buying into your point. Then it only takes a Foundational Phrase and perhaps another line or two to drive that point home and get your audience 100% across the bridge.

Top Line      O.     O.     O.

Bottom Line      O. . . . .

Look at the Top Line and Bottom Line above, because this is the mistake that speakers make. Look at the circle as the story and the dot as the point. The Top Line is great because you can see a story (circle) and the attached point (dot), then another story and the attached point and then another story and the attached point. That’s fine because each point is made by (and anchored to) the story.

What many speakers do is represented by the Bottom Line. They tell their story (circle) and then keep driving home several points (multiple dots). The problem here is that only the first point is attached to the story. The extra points (that are not anchored by the story) will all come across as preaching. Each point deserves its own story (or other anchor such as an Activity or Analogy) and that way each point can be uncovered within the story and prevent you from preaching. Keep those images in mind.

Guideline #3 – Don’t tell; ask

So often I hear speakers make statements like, “We all have tough challenges in our lives…” and this sparks people in the audience to think, “What makes you think you know about me? Why do you say I have challenges?”

That’s the problem with “telling” your audience members about themselves. The solution is to ask. For example, instead of saying, “We all have challenges…,”prequalify your statement by asking, “Raise your hand if you’ve ever faced a challenge?”  Most hands will go up.

Secret Key: When you’re asking a question in which you want to get a “yes,” then it’s a great idea to include the past rather than just the future. For example, you will get many more hands raised if you say, “Raise your hand if you’ve ever faced a challenge.” You will get fewer hands if you say, “Raise your hand if you are facing a challenge.”

That’s why I love to use the following stems:

“Have you ever…”

“Raise your hand if you have ever…”

Those phrases are much more inclusive and will get almost all hands to go up. Then, once you qualify them with that question, you can continue with something like, “That’s what I thought. Well, wouldn’t it be nice to have a system of turning each challenge into an opportunity? Well, guess what? There is a system. It’s called…”

There is nothing “preachy” about that because you did not tell them about themselves, you asked them about themselves.

Final Thoughts:

If you have a conversation with your audience instead of preaching to your audience, you will connect and they will want you back time and time again. See…even that previous sentence had five more “yous and yours!”

38 Responses to “3 Ways to Avoid Preaching when you Speak”

Speaking in Bali, Indonesia

As soon as you start learning to speak, what’s one thing speakers and speech coaches tell you? They say, “Pause.” A lot of conversation goes into tell you to pause but not enough conversation goes into showing you the specifics of when and how and for how long, etc.

Below are five moments in which you can pause along with tools you can use to maximize the impact of those pauses so you connect deeper with every future audience. Here are the five reasons:

Moment #1 –  When you ask a question

So often I see speakers ask their audiences a question but then they don’t pause long enough to let the audiences respond. If you want a verbal response then it becomes easy. However, when the question is rhetorical, it becomes slightly more difficult? Why? Because you might not know how long to pause. What you pick up here is my secret key to asking questions and  pausing for the appropriate length.

Secret Key: In my mind, I answer the question I just asked as if I am in my audience.

For example, let’s take a question I heard in my bootcamp this past weekend. The speaker asked, “When you were in Grade 3, what did you want to be when you grew up?”

If you were to ask that question, how long would you pause? Well, I would answer my own question in my mind after I asked it so that I could hopefully match how long it would take my audience to think, reflect, and answer the question in their minds.

For example, after I asked the question, I would answer in my mind, “Well, I wanted to be Dr. J (pro basketball player) and have my own farm with horses.” However long it takes me to answer my question is how long I pause. After I answer it in my mind, I continue talking. In this case, I continue by asking the follow-up question, “Is that what you have become?”

How long would I pause after this second question? Here’s a quiz for you. Would I pause longer or shorter than I paused for the first question? I’d pause shorter for the second question. Why? Because it’s a yes or no question. Think about it. If (like my bootcamp attendee did), I asked, “Is that what you have become?” the answer is either yes or no. That’s only one word. Therefore, after I ask the question, I answer it in my mind by saying, “No.” Guess what? That’s how long (or short) I pause! That’s it. Pretty simple, right?

Whenever you ask a rhetorical question on stage, answer it in your own mind and that will give you an adequate and effective pause. You might even pause a bit longer because, let’s face it, unlike your audience, you already know what you’re going to ask so you have a head start in thinking of the answer.

Some speech coaches will tell you to count to five or seven or something like that. Do you know why I don’t suggest that? Because counting to five or seven takes you away from your message. To me it always seems artificial. However, if you answer the question you ask, you stay in tune with what your audience is going through and hence you’ll connect deeper with them. So much of your speaking success is determined by what’s going on in your mind as you speak.  

As you see from this strategy, how long you pause after your question depends on the question itself.

Moment #2 – After you say something profound

Another important reason to pause is after you say something that hits home with your audience. How do you know it hits home? You know by watching your watchers and listening to your listeners. You’ll see on their faces when it hits home. Over time, you will know which parts of your message resonate the deepest.

Here’s an example. Listen to this quick statement I make and the pause afterwards.

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Surely you heard the pause after the line “We invite them never the change.” It was a good pause for that audience. What do I mean that it was good for that audience?

Here’s something you might never have heard about pausing.

The size of the audience can help determine the length of your pause

The larger your audience, the longer you pause.

If you think about it, it makes sense because you’re pausing to make sure they “get” the statement. Well, if you’re in front of a smaller audience, you can look around the room quicker to see the confirmation on their faces or their heads nodding in agreement. In a larger audience it takes a bit longer to see all of head nods and expressions. If you were speaking to one person, the pause would be even shorter although it would still be there.

Too many speakers start feeding their audiences the next lines when the audience is still chewing on the current line. Let them finish chewing before you give them more. Many speakers know not to step on the laughter but they haven’t yet learned to avoid stepping on their audience’s thoughts and reflections.

Moment #3 – When you make your audience laugh

Knowing and doing are two different animals. Most speakers know not to keep talking while their audience is laughing. However, I still see way too many speakers doing it. Some speakers say, “But Craig, I don’t have enough time so I have to interrupt their laughter.” I say, “Cut something else out of your speech so you can make room for the laughter but don’t step on the laughter.”

Why? Because stepping on the laughter is rude to your audience. Your audience wants to be heard too. That’s why they laugh. That’s why they yell out at times. That’s why they nod their heads and give you verbal cues that they’re connected with you. Let them speak in their own ways including laughter.

The key is to get the laugh, pause, and then come back in at the very end of the laughter just as it’s dying down.

Keep in mind that laughter from a large audience requires a longer pause because it takes them longer to laugh. That’s why, each year, I see contestants in speech contests go over time. Why? They underestimate how long it takes those larger audiences to laugh.

Moment #4 – Before you begin your speech

Before you begin your speech, I suggest that you pause and look at your audience. I’m not talking about staring at them for 10 seconds and making everybody uncomfortable. I’m simply suggesting that you look at them and let them know you see them before you start speaking.

Why? Well, what do you think about a person who doesn’t look at you when you first meet? Some people won’t trust the person and others will think the person isn’t really interested in connecting with them. Either way, this is not good for the connection. Your audience can think the same thing about you if you don’t at least acknowledge their presence with a look that says, “I see you” before you begin your speech (i.e. as you first meet). The good news is this can be done in a couple of seconds.

Moment #5 – When you are showing a visual reaction to what has occurred in your story

Last but certainly not least is the pause you give inside of your stories. I already covered this in a separate blog entry but it’s worth bringing up again. To revisit that entry click here and scroll down to the part of that entry that says “The Problem with Silence.”

Why Don’t Speakers Pause Long Enough

I believe speakers don’t pause enough (or long enough) because they’re afraid they’ll forget what to say next. So instead they rush off to the next line for fear of forgetting it. So what’s the solution to this?

 Don’t memorize; internalize

 I don’t believe speakers should ever be worried about what they’re going to say next. Instead, they should have rehearsed to a point where they can forget their speech and have it come back to them at all of the correct times. That keeps it fresh. This can be done by internalizing your speech rather than memorizing it. Stay tuned for a future newsletter lesson on how to internalize your speech.

Final Thoughts

Speakers and speech coaches constantly point out the importance of the pause, but now you hopefully have some more insight into when and how to do it. Keep in mind this is not an exhaustive list of when and how to pause. However, it is a reminder of five very important moments in your speech that you can use to establish and deepen your connection to your audience.

14 Responses to “5 Ways to Master the Pause”

Because this is the Holiday season, I felt like giving the gift that keeps on giving. Below are five very important newsletters from the past 2-3 years.

I’m sure there may be other newsletters of mine that hit you more where you live. However, if you act on the suggestions from these 5, you should gain a significant edge over most speakers when it comes to mastering this wonderful art of public speaking.  

If you have read them before, you should enjoy seeing them again from your new perspective.

Enjoy and Happy Holidays!

Five Must-See Newsletters from the Past Two Years

 The #1 Storytelling Mistake Speakers Make (and 3 ways to fix it)

 Two Delivery Tools to Uncover Humor in your Speech

 25 Phrases to Guide you to Greatness in Speaking

 4 Mistakes that Make You Lose Your Audience

 Intangibles of Speaking – 20 Ideas to Have Presence and Speak from the Heart

If you want to continue mastering the art of public speaking, stay tuned for more valuable newsletters to come!

12 Responses to “Five of my Top Newsletters from the Past Two Years”

As you know, how you open and close your speech is critically important. Below are two tools you can use to open with impact and close meaningfully even when stressed for time.

Let’s start with your opening. Can you think of any reason why I would advise you (at times) to scrap what you’ve prepared for an opening? Here’s why?

Many times the best way to connect with your audience is to do an opening call-back that you just uncovered at, or on your way to, the event.  

The Opening Call-back

What’s that? It’s not something you’ve planned for weeks. Instead, it’s something that happened related to that specific engagement. For example, it might be…

• something that happened to you as you traveled to the engagement
• something that somebody said earlier during the engagement
• the way someone treated you before you stepped on stage

 In a nutshell, it’s anything related to that event that you can bring up as you open your speech.

Why does the Opening Call-back work so well?

Audience members want to feel like your speech is special to you. They want to feel like it’s specifically designed for them but that it still has meaning for you. They want to make sure it’s not a speech you are giving with your eyes closed. They don’t want to feel like you’re speaking to every audience you’ve ever had. Instead, they want to know you are focused on this one and only engagement. They want to feel like parts of your speech “could only have happened here.”

Celine Dion taught me this lesson

In 2002 I watched a program where Celine Dion was about to sing her famous song from the Titanic movie. Before she started I thought, “Wow, she must have sung this song thousands of times. I wonder if it’s still special to her.” Then she looked at the audience and let them know that the song had a special meaning to her that day because it was the 90th anniversary of the day the Titanic sank. Even though I was watching on television, you could feel the connection with her audience deepen. I remember thinking, “This is going to be special and this is only happening once.”

What’s Your Flavor?

The other benefit to using an opening call-back is that whatever you do in the opening flavors the rest of your speech in your audience’s eyes. Therefore, when you open with something specific to them, they think, “Great. This is not canned. He’s speaking to us!” Plus, it usually involves someone they know and that person can temporarily become the star of the speech. A great way to connect with your audience is to turn a few of them into stars.  

For example, recently I spoke outside of Philadelphia and, when I approached the registration table, one of the volunteers said something to me that I knew I could use for my opening. Listen to how it went.

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What you heard was simply a direct quotation I used from the volunteer who met me at the registration table. But what happened as a result? First, it got a nice laugh and loosened up the audience. Then, what you couldn’t see is that she actually raised her hand and took the credit for the line thereby making her the star. Finally, it set the tone in their minds that the speech would be fresh and not a stale repetition of past engagements.

FYI – You also heard a couple of small call backs to the “positive charge” and the “Hula Girls.” There’s no need for a detailed explanation. Just know they were call backs to things that happened during the event.  

Do You Really Have to Scrap Your Prepared Opening?

No. What did you hear me do after I finished the Opening Call-back? I transitioned into my prepared opening, which you heard me begin to deliver (i.e. “I was traveling so much…”). You don’t actually have to scrap your prepared opening. You just push it back a bit so you can go into it with all the wonderful momentum created from the Opening Call-back  

Next Opening Call-back Example

As I write this, I am sitting in Bali, Indonesia where I recently gave two speeches. Here is how I opened the first speech.

“Here’s how I knew I would love Bali. Raise your hand if you took a flight to get here? Do you know how, when you go through Customs in most countries, the officers are very stiff? They say things like, ‘What will you be doing in our country? Where will you be staying? And, more importantly, when will you be leaving?’ Well, the Customs Officer in Bali was different. He simply looked at my passport and then looked at me and said, ‘Are you sure you’re not Obama?’”

This got a huge laugh and set the tone not only for that speech but for both of my speeches. And all weekend long people repeated that line.

 Make no mistake about it, sometimes audience members and people you meet on the way to your engagement give you the material for your speech. Your job as a speaker is to always keep your eyes and ears open for the interesting experiences you have on your way to the engagement. If you think like a speaker, I believe that at least 50% of the time you will find something you can use as an Opening call-back that will connect you with that specific audience and let them know, “This only happened here.”

Bonus Lesson 

Emergency Landings

Here’s an extra quick lesson for you today. If you are or want to be a professional speaker, it is very important to be one thing:

A professional!

One of the ways to show your professionalism is by keeping your client’s agenda on time. Therefore, it is essential for you not to go over time with your speech. In a contest, if you go over time, you are disqualified. In the real world, if you go over time, you will most likely not get re-hired. Plus you can do serious harm to all the planning that went into the event.

Knowing this, whenever I find myself short on time (which is usually the result of having a very lively and interactive group…and that’s great!) I use what I call an Emergency Landing. Here’s how it works.

I have my audience review my main points using the Discuss and Debrief method.

Then, instead of going into my closing story, which usually takes between 4-6 minutes, I simply close with a quick thought.

Here’s an example of an emergency landing I did at a Toastmasters Conference where I talked about my path to the World Championship.

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My Challenges for You

Challenge Number One: Attempt to use an Opening Call-back in an upcoming speech.

Challenge Number Two: Develop an Emergency Landing for every speech you give.

Your Turn

Have you used an Opening Call-back? If so, what did you say and how did it go?

Do you have an Emergency Landing for your speech?

18 Responses to “Speech Opening Call-backs and Emergency Landings”

This summer my wife and I drove to Erie, Pennsylvania for a wedding. While on Rt. 70 for quite a while, we saw a huge sign that read as follows:

Last Place for Fuel and Food for 122 miles”

Guess what we did? We stopped at that rest-stop/restaurant park.  

Why did we stop? It’s because of the influence that scarcity and urgency had on us. We didn’t necessarily plan to stop there but we definitely didn’t want to go another 122 miles before we could stop for food and fuel.

Whoever put up that sign knew something very important about influencing others and that’s that scarcity and urgency are huge factors.

Why Getting them to Take Action is Not Enough

I’ve seen lots of speakers give a call to action, but many of them are missing scarcity and urgency. It’s not enough to influence people to take action, you must influence them to take action now. Why? Because if they don’t take action now, chances are they never will. Life will get in the way and block the view they had of your initial suggestion.

Here’s one way I have used scarcity and urgency in my speeches. I’ve said something like:

“If you don’t write down your perfect day within the next 48 hours, you most likely never will.”

When selling one of my products, listen to what I say at the end of the offer (Clip is 38 seconds):

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Guess what happens when I let my audience know I only have 10 courses with me? People suddenly find a reason to act now.

In fact, a few months ago in Seattle, I only had 18 courses on me and I let my audience know it. As soon as I made my offer (I hadn’t even finished my speech yet), audience members started leaving. I thought, “Uh oh, what did I do? Did I say something that upset them?” Then I overheard one of them say, “I have to be one of the first 18!” That’s when I realized they weren’t leaving. They were heading towards my product table to be first in line. That’s what scarcity and urgency do for you. They prompt your audience to act now.

My wife said, "When will we ever be back at Rick's Cafe in Jamaica? Just jump!"

Scarcity and Urgency work for Marketing Too 

By the way, just as a side note, scarcity and urgency are also very good for marketing. For example, Mitch Meyerson and I run the World Class Speaking Coach Certification Course each June and we make sure to let our site’s visitors know that the course ONLY HAPPENS ONCE PER YEAR. That provides urgency because we have a limited number of spots available.

So make sure you find ways to put urgency and/or scarcity behind each call to action you give in your speech whether it involves a product or simply a next step.

 How can You Apply This?

Let’s look at a process for implementation.

The process I use is simply to ask myself the following questions about the actions I suggest my audience members take. 

1. What results can they expect if they act on my message (or invest in this product/program)?
2. Why should they do it now?
3. What happens to most people who don’t do it?
4. What happens to most people who wait to do it?
5. How can they separate themselves from the pack of most people?

 When I ask myself these questions, it becomes immediately apparent what I need to say to my audience to get them to act and to act now.

 Here are some of the scarcity/urgency-related statements I have made to influence them to take action now:

• “Most people won’t act…” Note: This works great because of one of the truths I’ve uncovered, which is “Most people don’t want to be most people.”
• “Most people procrastinate…”
• “If you don’t do it within the next 48 hours, chances are you won’t ever do it…”
• “You get a $$ discount today only…”
• “There are only 10 (or 18 or however many products or spaces) left…”

 Another Powerful Tool for Getting them to Act Now 

What you’ve read above will work. However, there is another very effective way to get audience members to take action now. It’s to sell the belief. Get your audience to buy-into the belief that procrastination (in general) is destructive and acting now is constructive. You can do this throughout your speech and also at the end.

For example, years ago I used to end my speeches by talking about how most people live their lives on “get-set.” By getting my audience involved in this belief, they are more apt to accept it and act now. Listen to how I used to end one of my keynote speeches by selling this belief (clip is 7 minutes).

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Getting my audience to see the problem and then understand the solution (i.e. “Go!”) gets them at least half-way across the bridge to taking an action. This belief, in combination with the other scarcity and urgency tools, usually helps push, pull, and influence my audience to take action now. The same will happen with your audiences…if you find a way to integrate these tools into your very next speech. After all, if you don’t do it for the next speech…[well, you know the rest]

Your Turn

Can you share some of the ways your use urgency and scarcity in your speeches so that your audiences take action now? I’m looking forward to hearing from you. Thanks in advance.

7 Responses to “Urgency and Scarcity in Speaking”

Have you ever seen a speaker who seemed to be doing all the right things but still didn’t connect with the audience? Have you ever been that speaker? It’s like something is missing that you just can’t put your finger on. Well, I believe that’s where the following intangibles of public speaking come into play:

• Speaking from the heart
• Presence
• Mindset

Speaking from the Heart

What does it mean to speak from the heart? You know it when you see it (or feel it), right? To me it means…

1. Feeling and believing everything you say.
2. Instead of memorizing, you’ve internalized your message.
3. You really live the message.
4. You have no doubt that what you’re saying is what you should be saying. If you go in with doubts, they’ll come out with doubts.
5. Being under the influence of your own emotions during the speech.
6. Reliving your stories rather than retelling them
7. Emotionally being in each of your scenes because you cannot bring an audience into a scene (at least emotionally) if you’re not in it emotionally.  
8. Not having to write out your speech and put “Smile here” or “Lift left arm here” to remind yourself of your gestures.
9. Being willing to open yourself up to your audience
10. Telling your story and admitting your flaws

One day, when I used to run an employment academy for homeless men in Baltimore City, I heard a beautiful sound coming from Bernice’s (one of my Case Managers) office. It literally stopped me dead in my tracks and I asked, “Who is that singing?”  Bernice said, “Its Eva Cassidy. She was a singer out of Washington, DC who died way too young. I really feel her songs.”

I felt it too…all the way down the hall! So I purchased the CD (remember CDs?) and was immediately amazed by her simple yet heartfelt renditions. Interestingly enough, she actually has a song called “I Know You by Heart.”

Eva Cassidy sang straight from the heart. I hear others singing the same exact songs but nobody seems to sing them with as much heart as she did. When you listen to her, you know she feels everything she sings. It’s like she’s being sung through. In speaking, at times it can feel like you’re being spoken through. When you have 100% conviction in your message and you can check off numbers 1-10 above, chances are you’ll be speaking from the heart.

Presence

What does presence mean? You know it when you see it, right? To me presence comes from…

1. Being 100 percent present (that’s right, having presence comes from being present)
2. Only focusing on your audience and what they are getting.
3. Not worrying about whether or not they like you.  
4. Really looking at them and listening to them while you speak.
5. Realizing when someone’s light goes on in your audience and non-verbally acknowledging that by sending them a signal or a look.
6. Being able to have a true dialogue rather than a monologue with your audience.
7. Responding to their responses.
8. Finding a person who really needs to hear that particular part of your message and looking directly at him/her when you say it.
9. Forgetting your speech and allowing it to simply all come back to you at the right time.  
10. Never worrying about remembering what to say next but focusing completely on what your audience is hearing now.

Mindset

Here are several ideas to consider when it comes to how you think as a speaker.

I believe what you think about immediately before going on stage will make or break your speech. Therefore, instead of it just being your skill-set, it’s also your mindset that makes the difference. Many speakers hope and pray to do well. However, to make the greatest impact on your audience, who does it make sense to think about? Your audience!

This is why, immediately before going on stage, I tell myself to…

Forget myself, remember my speech, and touch my audience in a positive impactful way

I believe the way a speaker thinks about preparation makes the difference between how well they impact their audience. For example, a lot of speakers think:

“I want to prepare so I can remember everything I need to say”

However, my view is different. I think the following:

I want to prepare so much that I can forget what I’ve prepared.

That way it can all come back to me at the right time, in the right space, and with the right fresh spontaneous energy. This is what makes your audience feel like you’re giving the speech for the first time. It’s not memorized, it’s internalized.

In my opinion…

Spontaneity is on the far side of preparation

I believe what a speaker thinks about past speeches impacts what’s going to happen in future speeches. For example, after a great presentation, a speaker might think…

“I hope my next audience is like this one!”

On the other hand, here’s what I force myself to think after a great engagement:

I have to let go of this audience before I get to my next one

Why in the world would I want to let go of the great feelings and connection I had with a great audience? Because if you don’t let go of your past audience, you cannot fully embrace your next audience.  For example, I have a friend who once gave a great speech in Canada but then gave a poor speech a week later in South Africa. Guess what? It was the same speech! What I believe was the difference was he still held onto his Canadian audience, which didn’t let him fully embrace his South African audience.

I’ve had audiences that were so good I’ve wanted to replay the event over and over in my head. But Keep in mind one thing:

Your new audience doesn’t care what you did for your past  audience

The key is to let that past audience go so you can focus 100% of your energy on the audience in front of you. This will help with your presence and speaking from the heart.

Speaking of past audiences, sometimes people ask me, “Craig, what keeps you grounded and working hard as a speaker?”

My answer is always the same. My motto is the following;

You’re only as good as your next speech

Your past successes mean nothing to your future audiences. When you accept that you’re only as good as your next speech, you prepare accordingly each and every time. And when you do, you automatically find yourself speaking from the heart, having a great presence, and touching lives in a profound way.

31 Responses to “Intangibles of Speaking – 20 Ideas to Have Presence and Speak from the Heart”

Years ago, one of my coaching said to me, “Craig, you have a rhythm when you speak. How can I get a rhythm into my speeches?”

I have to admit, at the time, I was stumped for an answer. I really hadn’t thought much about it. However, a few months later, it hit me. Speaking is certainly a lot like music and there is a rhythm to it.

The Advantage to Having Rhythm in your Speech?

There is also a major benefit to having a rhythm in your speech. Can you guess what that is?

It makes the speech more memorable!

Think about it. Aren’t there some songs you haven’t heard for years but, if you heard them today, you would remember the words? That’s because music has that kind of power. The rhythm helps deliver the message. Speaking can have a similar power if it’s rhythmic.

Proof of the Power of the Rhythm

Just the other day I received a phone call from a prospect who said, “Craig, I saw you speak 10 years ago and I remember when you said, ‘People buy-into what they help create.’ Well, I need some buy-in from my staff today so I want to bring you in to speak.”

Wow, 10 years! Believe it or not, I’m sure the repetition and the rhythm behind the points I drove home that day had a lot to do with why he still remembered them.

Let’s look at how you can have Rhythm in your Speaking

When I was in middle school, I remember our music teacher showing us how to put a song together. Today I look at speaking in a very similar way.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not a musician nor do I pretend to be. After all, when people hear me sing they say, “I’m glad you can speak.” However, the way a very simple song is put together has similarities with the way a speech can be put together…especially a keynote speech.

Speaking of Singing

Here’s what I remember about the structure of a song. It’s what is regularly called the AABA form.

Verse A

Chorus

Verse A

Chorus

Bridge

Verse A

Chorus

Speaking of Speaking

Now let’s look at the way a speech can be put together compared to the song.

Verse A – This is similar to the first story of your speech

Chorus – This is the Foundational Phrase (or takeaway message) of your first story

Verse A  - This is the second story of your speech

Chorus – This includes call backs to the Foundational Phrases of your first and second stories

Bridge – According to Wikipedia, in music, the “…bridge is a contrasting section which also prepares for the return of the original material section.” In other words, it is not the same as the verses but it gets you back to the verses afterwards. What does this mean for speaking?

I strongly suggest at this point that you depart from your stories and head to something different like a short activity, some questions for your audience, a discuss and debrief, or something that will change the rhythm of the speech.  This keeps your audience on their toes and energizes them.

One of the ideas I learned from Ed Tate is that once people get too used to your rhythm of speech, they start to tune you out. Therefore, it’s important to change your rhythm at times and “taking it to the bridge” will help with that.

Verse A – Once you’ve transitioned back from the bridge, you can tell your third story.

Chorus – This includes call backs to the Foundational Phrases from your three stories. When you repeat these phrases, it’s similar to the repetition of the chorus. Aren’t there some choruses you can’t get out of your head? Guess what? By repeating your Foundational Phrases throughout the rhythm of your speech, you will make them stick.

The Other Key to Having a Rhythm to your Speech

Here’s the biggest key I learned for having a rhythm to your speech:

Silence!

That’s right, it’s not what you say; it’s what you don’t say that matters. It also matters when you don’t say it. This involves timing.

I’m consistently reminded of something I read years ago that, through research, I found was said by the French Composer Claude Debussy.

Music is the silence between the notes

Later, through reading Deepak Chopra and others, I learned…

Without silence between notes, music would simply be noise

I’ve always thought about those quotes related to speaking. So often speakers are worried about what they’re going to say. We need to also be mindful about when we’re going to be silent and let the rhythm speak.

For example, here is one very small section of a story I tell about a speaking hero of mine. Listen for the silence:

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Welcome back. Did you hear it? There was a long silence between my notes and this affected my speech in several ways.

1. When I became silent, my audience members began to experience my disappointment with me
2. They also wondered what I would do (and what they would have done) in that situation
3. It made them want to hear what was coming next
4. It gave my audience time to catch up after my excitement and fast pace from intitially meeting my hero
5. It made my audience look at my face (and other visual cues) to try to determine what I was thinking and where the story would go. This is an extreme benefit to taking silence.

Problem with Silence

One of the big problems with silence is that many speakers are afraid of it. They’re afraid their audience will tune out or think that the speaker has forgotten the speech.

In fact, think back to the silence you just heard in that audio. In one of my DVDs that includes that same story, the videographer actually edited the video and took out those several seconds of silence! I couldn’t believe it! I wanted to say, “Are you kidding me? That’s one of the most important parts of the story.” After all, I want music, not noise. So we had him put it back in. He probably saw the silence as an enemy. You should see it as your best friend.

The takeaway is to not be afraid of the silence. It will only give your speech the rhythm it deserves and provide your audience with an experience and a message they won’t soon forget.

My Question to you 

If you too see speaking as being musical or rhythmic, how are you using that to your advantage?

Final Thought

“I’ve leave you with something more important than anything I’ve said today. I’ll leave you with this…”

21 Responses to “The Rhythm of Speaking”