Posts Tagged ‘speaking’
Open Your Speech and Open Their Minds
Click the arrow in the audio player below to listen to this 1-minute audio of a live Q&A I held in Saudi Arabia that teaches a lesson about how NOT to open your speech.
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So How Can You Open The Speech?
Now that you see what not to do during your opening, let’s look at two ways to open your speech with a bang so your audience knows, within the first 7 seconds, that they’re in the right place and they’re glad to be there.
1. Begin with a Powerful Question Specific to that Audience:
For example, if I’m speaking to an audience of small business owners, I can ask, “What do you think is the number one reason most small businesses cannot seem to get more customers?” If you were a small business owner, would you want to know the answer? Great, then you’re hooked with my first sentence.
If I’m speaking to a group of people who are in a self-development organization, I can ask, “What do you think is the number one obstacle standing between most people living their dreams?” I can tell you from their responses that they’re definitely interested in the answer. Therefore, I’ve hooked them with my very first sentence. Whatever you do, make sure you invest lots of time and energy in the way you phrase your question because those first 7 seconds are critical to the success of the rest of your speech.
2. Jump Right Into Your Story
Although opening with a powerful question is highly-effective, another great way to open is with a story. When I say “a story” I don’t mean that you begin with something like the following: “I’d like to tell you a story about a time…” No! Don’t announce that you’re about to tell a story; just tell it. Jump right into the story from your very first words. For example, oftentimes the very first thing I used to say from the stage (after being introduced and the applause died down) was this:
When I was in prison…visiting, one of the inmates came up to me after my presentation and said…
This works well for two reasons:
First, it’s unexpected because audiences are usually expecting the speaker to say things like, “I’m glad to be here” or “Thanks for the opportunity.” Those are normal statements that make the audience think, “There will be nothing special about this speech.” However, when you jump right into your story, they jump right into your speech.
Next, when I open with the ”When I was in prison” statement above, I get a laugh within the first 5 words. This is critical because, within the first 7 seconds, we start building a bond.
This is also the reason I usually start my speeches today by diving directly into a letter my 6-year old daughter wrote me, which is not a full-blown story but serves as a connection piece nonetheless. I start off like this:
I’ve been on the road quite a bit recently and my 6-year-old daughter wrote me a note. She wrote, ‘Dear Daddy, I miss you. You are the best daddy in…my whole family.’ I gotta be honest, up until I received that note I thought I was the ONLY daddy in the family. Maybe I should stay off the road and make sure no more daddies are coming through my family.
The way that’s delivered helps me immediately bond with my audience with three strong laughs and a sign to the audience that says, “This is going to be interesting and maybe even fun!” Jumping directly into your story from the very first word is a brilliant way to start.
What about doing an activity?
In the past I used to begin some of my speeches with an activity but here’s why that’s not usually such a great idea. Ready?
You have to earn the right to make your audience do something.
What if someone you don’t know came up to you and said, “Put your arm out to your side and repeat after me.” You’d probably say, “How about you put your hand up to your face and cover your mouth.” In other words, “Stop talking to me.” This is because you have no bond. However, if a friend asked you to do it, you’d trust him enough to at least see what he was up to and what point he was making.
Well, it’s the same with your audience. You need to build a bond before you ask them to get up and do some kind of activity. That’s why I now usually put my first activity after my opening laughs and after my first major story, which also builds an emotional bond with my audience. At that time, they know, like, and trust me a little bit more, which makes it a perfect time to do an activity.
There is at least one exception.
As always you should look to understand the culture within your audience and the speaking engagement itself. If they’ve been doing activities all day long, it seems to be part of their culture, and the energy is still high when you get up to speak, then opening with an activity might be effective and even expected. You’ll have to figure out the culture and then fit into it.
However, the two best ways to open for most speeches are with a powerful question or by going directly into your story. Don’t collect $200. Don’t pass Go. Just head directly into your story and watch as your audience leans forward in anticipation of your message.
And whatever you do, please remember that after you begin your speech is not the time to do a sound check!
My Biggest Mistake and the Two Tools That Fixed It
I’ve always prided myself in being a content-rich speaker so imagine my surprise when I had the following conversation after a speech. A couple ladies cornered me and said, “You had a lot of content in your speech.” I said, “Thank you.” Then they said, “We mean you had too much content.” At first I thought, “Too much content? I’ve spent all this time striving to be a content-rich speaker and now they’re telling me I have too much content?” Guess what? They were right.
The problem with having too much content is just what one of the ladies told me. She said, “As soon as I’d begin writing something down, you’d say something else worth remembering and I wouldn’t catch it. Because you shared so many points, I’m afraid I won’t recall any of them.”
Here’s the problem many speakers will face if they are not careful
When we start to know more and more about our topic, inevitably that “more” ends up finding its way into our speech. What’s important to realize about speaking is that oftentimes less is more. Just because you know more doesn’t mean you have to show more within that speech.
Here are two great solutions to keep your audience from feeling lost or overwhelmed
- Tighten up your structure by calling back to each major point before you move onto the next point. For example, if my point is on Facing Reality, once I make the point I can transition by saying, “So you face reality with whatever measurement scale you use because, remember, you master what you measure. Once you face reality, the next step is to…” Then, every time I finish my other points, I make sure to call back to every single one of the points I already covered. For my four Rs, I’ll call back to Facing reality, Relinquishing what’s in the way, Relying on the people and processes, and Reforming to a better way. Regularly calling back like this makes your message very clear and keeps your audience members from getting lost.
- Use my 10 to 1 Rule of Thumb. Part of my mistake was that I tried to fit too many points into too little time. Now I use my 10 to 1 Rule of Thumb. For every 10 minutes I speak, I feel I can make an average of one point that I can illustrate effectively and make palatable for my audience. Therefore, if I’m asked to speak for 45 minutes, I’ll do my 4 Rs to Remarkable Results speech. If I’m asked to speak for 30 minutes, I’ll do my 3 Rs to Remarkable Results. The key is to heed the old speaker proverb that, “When you squeeze your information in, you squeeze your audience out.” By using a similar formula to my 10 to 1, you’ll move towards much greater clarity and your message will be easily digested.
So What Can We Learn from This?
Being content-rich should not include filling your audience up with content until they overflow. Instead, it should be about giving them a few solid, memorable, and actionable ideas that they can use to improve their situation. Indeed less is more. I’ll leave it at that.
A Key to Public Speaking: No Phrase, No Stage (Video)
Have you ever wondered what to keep in your story and what to take out?
Have you ever wondered how to tighten up your message?
Have you ever wondered how to find the phrase that makes your story stick?
Watch the video below and see one of the most important processes for making a point that resonates and sticks.
For more on the Foundational Phrase and the structure for a keynote speech, visit http://www.createyourkeynote.com/ and take advantage of a limited-time offer.
Be Funny and Clear by Using the Rule of Three
If the most important word in speaking is ‘you,’ the most important number in speaking is three. The Rule of 3 manifests in many ways. It helps make your speech more humorous, clearer, and more memorable.
Use it For Humor
Let’s start with the humor. The Rule of Three applies when you have three examples that you mention back to back to back, and the third provides a twist. For example, when I talk about writing down your perfect day, I say the following:
“I did this years ago and everything I wrote down has come to pass. I wrote down, I wanted to be a professional speaker— I’m a professional speaker! I said I wanted to own my own business – I own my own business. I said I wanted a white Mercedes Benz convertible – I have a white Honda Accord. I’m getting there.”
As you can see, the third example is the twist, and that makes it funny. The interesting thing is this; I’ve actually tried four examples before, thinking it would build up the twist even more, but guess what happened? It fell flat. It just doesn’t work as well. There’s something magical about the Rule of 3. So use three examples, not four, two or five.
Use it For Clarity
Now let’s move on to clarity and making your message memorable. I used to give a one-hour workshop in which I gave my audience 7 Secrets to Speaking Success. It was an okay program, but do you know what took it to a much higher level? I changed the program, and instead of offering seven secrets, I offered three sections. For example, instead of saying, “You’re going to pick up seven strategies,” I said the following:
“If you look at your handout, you’ll see you will first pickup strategies on how you can breathe life into a speech and make your audience come alive. Then you’ll pick up tools on how you can bring the audience to you and keep them engaged at all times, and hopefully awake. And third, you’ll pick up tools on how you can build a message that sticks, so that people will rehire you time and time again.”
Do you see the three sections? Instead of having seven spots on my handout for them to fill out, I simply put the following three sections:
- Breathe life into your speech
- Bring the audience to you
- Build a message that sticks
I don’t know why it makes such a difference, and frankly I just don’t care. The bottom line is that it works. Today my audience grasps my message much easier and deeper than they did when I had seven points.
Use it to Make Your Message Stick
Here is the most interesting part. Today I actually give many more than seven pointers in my speech! However, because my audience can fit all of the pointers I give them into the three sections – Breathe Life, Bring Your Audience In, and Build a Message That Sticks – they get the message much clearer, and for some reason it sticks with them better.
Anytime you want to make nine points in a speech (which is probably a speech of at least 90 minutes), separate those points into three sections of three points each. If you have 27 points to make in a day-long workshop, separate them into three sections of nine points each, if possible. Whatever you do, find a way to use the Rule of Three. It flat out works! People remember best in threes.
One caveat:
In a 5-7 minute speech, using the Rule of 3 for humor is fine. However, in terms of points, refrain from trying to make more than one because that’s all the time you have to support and illustrate it. Trying to make 3 points in 5-7 minutes is futile.
3 Keys To Hook Your Audience Into Your Story
Tap, Tease, and Transport
Most speakers start their stories and hope their audiences will come along on those journeys. That’s average. World Class Speakers don’t do that. Instead, they make their audiences curious so that they want to come along. So here is the secret: it’s what you do before your story that really matters.
Example
For example, before one of my stories, I say the following:
“What do you think is the number one thing that stands between most people living their dreams?” The audience yells out various responses. Then, in a friendly/humorous way I say, “Those are all great answers and if you listen closely they all have the same thing in common. They’re all wrong.” The audience laughs. Then I say, “No, they’re not wrong. They’re just not the number one thing in my opinion that gets in the way. The number one thing is not what you think.”
What do you think the audience is thinking at that point? Right, they are thinking, “Okay, what is the number one thing?” And that is the key to curiosity. You have to get them to ask themselves a question and let them know the answer is coming up in the story.
Tap, Tease, and Transport
This is what I call the Tap, Tease, and Transport method. It is a three step process which includes:
1. Tapping into your audiences’ mind with a question
2. Teasing them to want to know more
3. Transporting them into your story
The Method in Action
Tap: I tapped into their mind by asking, “What do you think is the number one thing that stands between most people living their dreams?” That was the tap. I got them thinking about themselves!
Tease: Then, I told them, “Your answers are wrong. The number one thing is not what you think.” That’s the tease. Now they know they’ll find the number one thing inside my story so they are amped up to come along. Why? It is because they know they are going to be given a point that will help them reach their goals.
Transport: Finally, I transport them into my story in stealth fashion. What I mean by that is you should never say, “Well, listen to my story” or “Now I’m going to tell you a story” or anything like that. Instead, sneak into your story. Get them into your story before they realize you’re going to tell a story. Once you say something like, “I’m going to tell you a story,” many audience members put down their pens and let their minds wander elsewhere. Instead, sneak them into it.
For your next story, try this 3-step method out. When you use the tap, tease, and transport method, you’ll look up and see you have everyone’s undivided attention as they join you on your journey. Tap, Tease, and Transport.


